


Shadow (SEASON ONE, EPISODE SIXTEEN)

by ackles_ass_equation



Series: Superghetto [17]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Canon, Episode: s01e16 Shadow, Screenplay/Script Format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2016-05-12
Packaged: 2018-06-08 00:47:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6832093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ackles_ass_equation/pseuds/ackles_ass_equation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam has a reunion wit a hoe he once met, Meg yo, but it turns up dat her ass is rockin tha brothers ta lure they daddy Jizzy ta his fuckin lil' doom.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. NOW

FADE IN: Chicago, Illinois fo' realz. A lil' biatch, MEREDITH, is struttin home while listenin ta noize on her iPood. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! A tall, burly playa bumps tha fuck into her n' shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch gives his ass a gangbangin' finger-lickin' disgusted look n' continues ta strutt. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Shortly afta turnin tha corner, her iPood stops playin beatz. Drop dis like itz hot! MEREDITH takes off her headphones.

 **MEREDITH  
** Great. (A phat wind begins ta blow round her n' shit. Garbage n' leaves scatta all over dis biiiatch.) Hello, biatch?

No Muthafucka lyrics. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch tries ta ignore tha wind n' keeps struttin fo' realz. As she nears her crib, she looks over her shoulder n' sees tha shadow of a playa on tha wall of a funky-ass building. Da silhouette begins ta follow her n' shit. MEREDITH breaks tha fuck into a run. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch dashes across tha street n' finally reaches her crib. Frantically, she grabs her keys n' rushes ta find tha right one. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch findz tha key n' opens tha door, then goes inside n' slams it shut.

CUT TO: INT.- Apartment. MEREDITH bursts all up in tha door n' locks it behind her n' shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch entas a cold-ass lil code tha fuck into tha alarm system on tha wall.

 **ALARM SYSTEM  
** System disarmed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! (MEREDITH entas another code.) System armed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!

Bitch leaves tha room n' goes ta tha kitchen ta git a funky-ass brew afta settin down her bag n' keys. MEREDITH then moves ta tha livin room n' listens ta tha lyrics on her answerin machine.

 **KRISTEN  
** Yo, Meredith. It’s Kristen. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Yo ass gotta tell me what tha fuck happened last night. Call mah dirty ass.

Da beep soundz n' another message begins ta play. While MEREDITH listens ta tha message, tha shadow begins ta form on tha wall of tha crib. Well shiiiit, it begins as a swirlin cloud of smoke n' morphs tha fuck into tha silhouette of a tall, skinny creature. Da creature’s shadow slowly moves towardz MEREDITH’s shadow on tha wall. Well shiiiit, it sticks its long, sharp-nailed fingers all up in MEREDITH’s chest. MEREDITH’s blood splattas on tha wall, n' her shadow falls ta tha ground. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Da screen goes black.


	2. ACT ONE

FADE IN: EXT.- Apartment. One Week Later n' shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM n' DEAN stop they hoopty across tha street n' git out, dressed as hommiez of tha alarm system company. DEAN gets a toolbox from tha trunk of tha car, n' they proceed towardz tha crib.

 **SAM  
** All right, Dean. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. This is tha place.

 **DEAN  
** Yo ass know, I’ve gotta say Dad n' mah crazy ass did just fine without these wack costumes. I feel like a high school drama dork. (Dude smiles.) What was dat play dat you did, biatch? What was it- Our Hood. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Yeah, you was good, dat shiznit was cute.

 **SAM  
** Look, you wanna pull dis off or not?

 **DEAN  
** I’m just sayin’, these tracksuits cost hard-earned scrilla, aiiight?

 **SAM  
** Whose?

 **DEAN  
** Ours. Yo ass be thinkin credit card fraud is easy as fuck ?

CUT TO: INT.- Apartment. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM, DEAN, n' tha landlady enter.

 **SAM  
** Thanks fo' lettin’ our asses look around.

 **LANDLADY  
** Well, tha five-o holla'd they was done wit tha place, so….(Bitch n' SAM move further tha fuck into tha room. DEAN shuts tha crib door n' notices tha chain on tha door is broken. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch yo. Dude bigs up SAM. In tha livin room, spotz of blood cover tha carpet.) Yo ass muthafuckas holla'd you was wit tha alarm company?

 **DEAN  
** That’s right.

 **LANDLADY  
** Well, no offense yo, but yo' alarm’s bout as useful as tittizzles on a man. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.

DEAN n' SAM exchange a look.

 **DEAN  
** Well, that’s why we’re here, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. To peep what tha fuck went wack n' stop it from goin' down again.

 **SAM  
** Now, ma’am, you found tha body?

 **LANDLADY  
** Yeah.

 **SAM  
** Right afta it happened?

 **LANDLADY  
** No. Few minutes later n' shit. Meredith’s work called- she hadn’t shown up. I knocked on tha door. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. That’s when I noticed tha smell.

 **DEAN  
** Any windows open, biatch? Any sign of break-in?

 **LANDLADY  
** Fuck dat shit, windows was locked, front door was bolted. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! This type'a shiznit happens all tha time. Chain was on tha door, our crazy asses had ta cut it just ta git in.

 **DEAN  
** And tha alarm was still on?

 **LANDLADY  
** Like I holla'd, bang-up thang yo' company’s doin’.

 **DEAN  
** Mmhmm. Yo ass peep any overturned furniture, fucked up glass, signz of struggle, biatch?

Da landlady shakes her head.

 **LANDLADY  
** Everythang was up in slick condition- except Meredith.

 **SAM  
** And what tha fuck condizzle was Meredith in?

 **LANDLAY  
** Meredith was all over n' shit. In pieces. Da muthafucka whoz ass capped her must done been some kind of a whackjob. But I rap , if I didn’t know any better, I’d have holla'd a wild animal done did dat shit.

DEAN looks at SAM.

 **SAM  
** Ma’am, do you mind if we take some time, biatch? Give dis place a once-over?

 **LANDLADY  
** Oh, well, go right ahead. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Knock yo ass out.

CUT TO: Later n' shit. DEAN opens his cold-ass toolbox n' removes tha EMF meter.

 **DEAN  
** So, a killa strutts up in n' outta tha crib- no weapons, no prints, nothin’.

 **SAM  
** I’m tellin’ ya, tha minute I found dat article, I knew dis was our kind of gig.

Da EMF meta beeps frantically.

 **DEAN  
** I be thinkin I smoke wit you, biatch.

 **SAM  
** So, you talked ta tha cops?

 **DEAN  
** Uh, yeah. (Dude smirks.) I was rappin ta Amy, a, uh, charming, perky fool of tha law.

 **SAM  
** Yeah, biatch? What’d you smoke up?

 **DEAN  
** (dreamily) Well, she’s a Sagittarius. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch loves tequila, I mean- wow. Oh, n' she’s gots dis lil tattoo-

 **SAM  
** Dean!

 **DEAN  
** What, biatch? Yeah. Uh, nothin’ our phat asses don’t already know. Except fo' one thang they’re keepin’ outta tha papers.

 **SAM  
** Hm?

 **DEAN  
** Meredith’s ass was missing.

 **SAM  
** (stunned) Her heart?

 **DEAN  
** Yeah yo. Her ass.

 **SAM  
** So, what tha fuck do you be thinkin done did it ta her?

 **DEAN  
** Well, tha landlady holla'd it looked like a animal attack. Maybe it was- werewolf?

 **SAM  
** Fuck dat shit, no werewolf, tha lunar cycle’s not right. Plus, if dat shiznit was a cold-ass lil creature, it would’ve left some kind of trace. It’s probably a spirit, n' I aint talkin bout no muthafuckin Jack Daniels neither. Shiiit, dis aint no joke.

DEAN observes tha blood on tha carpet n' seems ta notice something.

 **DEAN  
** See if you can find any maskin tape around.

CUT TO: Later n' shit. DEAN uses tha maskin tape ta connect each pool of blood. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I be fly as a gangbangin' falcon, soarin all up in tha sky dawwwwg! When he is done, tha piecez of tape form a unusual symbol.

 **SAM  
** Ever peep dat symbol before?

 **DEAN  
** Never.

 **SAM  
** Me neither n' shit.

They exchange a look.

CUT TO: INT.- Bar. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Night. DEAN is flirtin wit tha bangin bartender n' shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM entas n' looks around. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! DEAN notices n' takes one last drink, then smilez all up in tha bartender n' leaves.

 **DEAN  
** See ya. (At tha other side of tha room, SAM findz a empty table n' sits down, takin up his wild lil' father’s journal. It aint nuthin but tha nick nack patty wack, I still gots tha bigger sack yo. Dude leafs all up in tha pages, n' shortly, DEAN sits down across from his muthafuckin ass.) I talked ta tha bartender.

 **SAM  
** Did yo dirty ass git anything, biatch? Besides her number?

 **DEAN  
** Dude, I’m a professional. It aint nuthin but tha nick nack patty wack, I still gots tha bigger sack. I’m offended dat you would be thinkin dis shit. (SAM gives his ass a knowin look.) All right, yeah.

Dude chucklez n' holdz up a napkin wit tha bartender’s beeper number on dat shit.

 **SAM  
** Yo ass mind doin’ a lil bit of thankin wit yo' upstairs dome, Dean?

 **DEAN  
** Huh, biatch? Look, there’s not a god damn thang ta smoke up. I mean, Meredith hit dat shiznit here, dat biiiiatch waited tables, mah playas here was her playa yo, but it ain't no stoppin cause I be still poppin'. All Y'all holla'd dat biiiiatch was normal. It aint nuthin but tha nick nack patty wack, I still gots tha bigger sack. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch didn’t do or say anythang weird before her dope ass died, so- what bout dat symbol, you find anything?

 **SAM  
** Nope, nothing. Well shiiiit, it wasn’t up in Dad’s journal or up in any of tha usual books. I just gotta dig a lil deeper, I guess.

 **DEAN  
** Well, there was a gangbangin' first victim, right, biatch? Before Meredith?

 **SAM  
** Right. Yeah. (Dude pulls up a newspaper clippin concernin tha straight-up original gangsta dirtnap.) His name was, uh- his name was Lil' Bow Wow Swardstrom. (Dude handz tha clippin ta DEAN.) Last month da thug was found mutilated up in his cold-ass hood house. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Same deal- the door was locked, tha alarm was on.

 **DEAN  
** Is there any connection between tha two of them?

 **SAM  
** Not dat I can tell- I mean, not yet, at least. Lil' Bow Wow was a funky-ass banker, Meredith was a waitress. They never met, never knew mah playas up in common- they was practically from different ghettos.

 **DEAN  
** So, ta recap, tha only successful intel we’ve banged up so far is tha bartender’s beeper number n' shit. (Dude smirks. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM seems ta notice suttin' all up in tha other side of tha room. DEAN looks around.) What, biatch? (SAM gets up n' begins struttin away.) Sam, biatch?

SAM continues ta strutt away yo. Dude reaches another table, where a lil' biatch wit short blonde afro is seated wit her back ta his muthafuckin ass yo. Dude puts his hand on her shoulder, n' dat dunkadelic hoe turns around. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Well shiiiit, it is MEG.

 **SAM  
** Meg.

 **MEG  
** Sam!

SAM looks at her curiously. Da screen goes black.

FADE IN: Bar. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM is still wit MEG at her table.

 **MEG  
** Sam! Is dat yo slick ass, biatch? Oh, mah Dogg hommie! (Bitch standz up n' they hug. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM looks slightly puzzled. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! They pull away all dem secondz later.) What is you bustin here?

 **SAM  
** I’m just up in town, hittin' up playas.

MEG looks around.

 **MEG  
** Where is they?

 **SAM  
** Well, they’re not here up in dis biatch yo, but what tha fuck bout you, Meg, biatch? I thought you was goin’ ta California.

DEAN comes up behind SAM.

 **MEG  
** Oh, I done did. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I came, I saw, I conquered. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Oh, n' I kicked it wit what’s-his-name, suttin' Mike Murray at a funky-ass bar.

 **SAM  
** Who?

 **MEG  
** Oh, it don’t matter n' shiznit fo' realz. Anyway, tha whole scene gots old, so I’m livin here fo' a while.

DEAN clears his cold-ass throat loudly yo, but he is ignored.

 **SAM  
** You’re from Chicago?

 **MEG  
** Fuck dat shit, Massachusetts- Andover n' shit. Gosh, Sam, what tha fuck is tha oddz we’d run tha fuck into each other?

 **SAM  
** Yeah, I know, I thought I’d never peep you again.

 **MEG  
** Well, I’m glad you was wrong. (SAM nods. DEAN clears his cold-ass throat again, louder dis time.) Dude, cover yo' grill.

 **SAM  
** Yeah, um, I’m sorry, Meg. This is, uh- this is mah brother, Dean. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.

MEG is surprised.

 **MEG  
** This is Dean, biatch?

DEAN smiles.

 **SAM  
** Yeah.

 **DEAN  
** So, you’ve heard of me son?

 **MEG  
** Oh, yeah. I’ve heard of you, biatch. Nice- the way you treat yo' brutha like luggage.

Dude looks confused.

 **DEAN  
** Sorry?

 **MEG  
** Why don’t you let his ass do what tha fuck da thug wants ta do, biatch? Quit draggin his ass over God’s chronic earth.

 **SAM  
** Meg, it’s all right.

Da three of dem look round on tha fuckin' down-lowly. DEAN whistlez lowly.

 **DEAN  
** Okay, awkward. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I’m gonna git a thugged-out drank now, nahmeean, biatch?

Dude gives SAM a puzzled look, then strutts over ta tha bar.

 **MEG  
** Sam, I’m sorry bout dat bullshit. It’s just- the way you holla'd at mah crazy ass tha pimpin' muthafucka treats you, biatch....if it was me, I’d bust a cap up in his muthafuckin ass.

 **SAM  
** It’s all right yo. Dude means well.

MEG nods.

 **MEG  
** Well, we should hook up while you’re up in town.

 **SAM  
** Yeah.

 **MEG  
** I’ll show you a hell of a time.

 **SAM  
** Yo ass know what, dat soundz pimped out. Why don’t you, uh- why don’t you give me yo' number, biatch?

Dude takes up his cell beeper n' gets locked n loaded ta input MEG’s number.

 **MEG  
** 312-555-0143.

 **SAM  
** Yo ass know what, I never gots yo' last name.

 **MEG  
** Masters.

 **SAM  
** Masters?

 **MEG  
** So, you betta call.

 **SAM  
** Scout’s Honor.

 **MEG  
** I hope ta peep you around, Sam.

Dude smilez at her n' strutts away.

CUT TO: EXT.- Bar. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. DEAN n' SAM is struttin back ta tha car.

 **DEAN  
** Dum diddy-dum, here I come biaaatch! Who tha fuck tha hell was she?

 **SAM  
** I don’t straight-up know. I only kicked it wit her once. Meetin up wit her again, biatch? I don’t know, dude, it’s weird.

 **DEAN  
** And what tha fuck was her big-ass booty saying, biatch? I treat you like luggage, biatch? What, was you biiiatchin’ bout me ta some chick?

 **SAM  
** Look, I’m sorry, Dean. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Dat shiznit was when our crazy asses had dat big-ass fight when I was up in dat bus stop up in Indiana. But that’s not blingin, just listen-

 **DEAN  
** Well, is there any truth ta what tha fuck she’s saying, biatch? I mean, is I keepin you against yo' will, Sam?

 **SAM  
** Fuck dat shit, of course not. Now, would you listen?

 **DEAN  
** What?

 **SAM  
** I be thinkin there’s somethin’ strange goin on here, Dean.

 **DEAN  
** Yeah, tell me bout dat shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch wasn’t even dat tha fuck into mah dirty ass.

 **SAM  
** Fuck dat shit, dude, I mean like our kind of strange. Like, maybe even a lead.

 **DEAN  
** Why do you say that?

 **SAM  
** I kicked it wit Meg weeks ago, literally on tha side of tha road. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! And now, I run tha fuck into her up in some random Chicago bar, biatch? I mean, tha same bar where a waitress was slaughtered by suttin' supernatural, biatch? Yo ass don’t be thinkin that’s a lil weird?

 **DEAN  
** I don’t know, random coincidence. Well shiiiit, it happens.

 **SAM  
** Yeah, it happens yo, but not ta us. Look, I could be wrong, I’m just sayin’ dat there’s suttin' bout dis hoe dat I can’t like put mah finger on. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.

DEAN smirks.

 **DEAN  
** Well, I bet you’d like to. I mean, maybe she’s not a suspect, maybe you’ve gots a thang fo' her, huh, biatch? (SAM rolls his wild lil' fuckin eyes n' laughs.) Maybe you’re thinkin’ a lil too much wit yo' upstairs dome, huh, biatch?

Dude points ta his head n' grins. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM becomes straight-up again.

 **SAM  
** Do me a gangbangin' favor. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Peep n' peep if there’s straight-up a Meg Mastas from Andover, Massachusetts, n' peep if you can’t dig anythang up on dat symbol on Meredith’s floor.

 **DEAN  
** What is you gonna do?

 **SAM  
** I’m gonna peep Meg.

 **DEAN  
** (laughing) Yeah, yo ass is.

 **SAM  
** I just wanna peep what’s what. Betta safe than sorry bout dat bullshit.

 **DEAN  
** All right, you lil pervert.

 **SAM  
** Dude.

 **DEAN  
** I’m goin’, I’m goin’.

Dude crosses tha street n' leaves SAM.

FADE TO: Motel Room. DEAN is on tha computer, researchin MEG n' tha symbol yo. Dude picks up his cell beeper n' dials a number n' shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM picks up. Da scene alternates between tha motel room n' tha car, where SAM is parked outside MEG’s crib.

 **SAM  
** Hey.

 **DEAN  
** Let me guess. You’re lurkin’ outside dat skanky girl’s crib, aren’t yo slick ass?

 **SAM  
** No. (DEAN waits fo' another response. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM rolls his wild lil' fuckin eyes.) Yes yes y'all.

 **DEAN  
** You’ve gots a gangbangin' funky way of showin’ yo' affection.

 **SAM  
** Did yo dirty ass find anythang on her or what?

 **DEAN  
** Sorry, dude, dat thugged-out biiiatch checks out. There be a Meg Mastas up in tha Andover phonebook. I even pulled up her high school photo. Now, look, why don’t you go knock on her door and, uh, invite her ta a poetry reading, or whatever it is you do, huh?

 **SAM  
** (ignorin his comment) What bout tha symbol, biatch? Any luck?

 **DEAN  
** Yeah, dat I did have some luck with. (Dude looks down at his bangin research.) It’s, uh- turns up it’s Zoroastrian. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Very, straight-up oldschool school, like two thousand muthafuckin years before Christ. It’s a sigil fo' a Daeva.

 **SAM  
** What’s a Daeva?

 **DEAN  
** It translates ta “demon of darkness”. Zoroastrian demons, n' they’re savage, animalistic, you know, nasty attitudes- kind of like, uh, demonic pit bulls.

 **SAM  
** How’d you figure dat out?

 **DEAN  
** Give me some credit, man. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Yo ass don’t gotz a cold-ass lil corner on paper chasin’ round here.

 **SAM  
** Oh, yeah, biatch? Name tha last book you read.

 **DEAN  
** (defeated) Fuck dat shit, I called Dad’s playa, Caleb yo. Dude holla'd at me, all right?

 **SAM  
** Yeah.

Dude glances up at MEG’s dark bedroom window.

 **DEAN  
** Anyway, here’s tha thang- these Daevas, they gotta be summoned, conjured.

 **SAM  
** So, one of mah thugs’s controllin it?

 **DEAN  
** Yeah, that’s what tha fuck I’m sayin’ fo' realz. And, from what tha fuck I gather, it’s pretty risky bidnizz, like a muthafucka. These suckers tend ta bite tha hand dat feedz dem wild-ass muthafuckas fo' realz. And, uh, tha arms, n' torsos.

 **SAM  
** So, what tha fuck do they look like?

 **DEAN  
** Well, no muthafucka knows yo, but no muthafucka’s peeped ‘em fo' a cold-ass lil couple millennia. I mean, summonin a thugged-out demon dat ancient, biatch? Someone straight-up knows they stuff. I be thinkin we’ve gots a major playa up in town. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Now, why don’t you go give dat hoe a private strip-o-gram?

 **SAM  
** Bite mah dirty ass.

 **DEAN  
** Fuck dat shit, bite her n' shit. Don’t leave teeth marks, though- (SAM hangs up.) Sam, biatch? Is you-, biatch?

Dude hangs up his own phone. Back all up in tha car, SAM glances back up at MEG’s window fo' realz. A few secondz later, a light turns on. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. MEG entas her bedroom, bustin a funky-ass black lace bra. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM looks round uncomfortably, then continues ta peep MEG. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch puts on a T-shirt. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM is interrupted by one of mah thugs clearin they throat yo. Dude turns n' sees a biatch standin outside tha car, lookin annoyed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Biatch gestures ta tha window.

 **SAM  
** Oh, no, no, no, I’m just­-

 **WOMAN  
** Pervert.

Bitch strutts away angrily. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM is stunned. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! A second later, MEG leaves her crib, now bustin a sweatshirt n' jacket as well. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch strutts across tha street, briefly glancin all up in tha parked car. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Once her ass is gone, SAM, whoz ass had been hiding, sits up yo. Dude gets outta tha hoopty n' bigs up her muthafuckin ass.

CUT TO: Street. MEG stops at a graffiti-covered wall. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch looks round before pullin open a thugged-out door, which seems ta be part of tha wall. When her ass is inside, SAM peers up from behind a funky-ass buildin yo. Dude also strutts ta tha wall n' entas all up in tha camouflaged door.

CUT TO: INT.- Warehouse. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM entas n' strutts up a gangbangin' flight of stairs yo. Dude reaches a thugged-out door all up in tha top, which he attempts ta open yo, but it is locked. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Dude looks round n' sees a gangbangin' fucked up down elevator gate yo. Dude entas tha gate n' begins ta climb tha side of it, rockin different bars as footrests, n' you can put dat on yo' toast. When he reaches tha top, he be able ta peer all up in tha gate tha fuck into a gangbangin' finger-lickin' dimly lit room. There be a funky-ass black altar up in tha middle of tha room. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM sees MEG enta n' strutt over ta tha altar yo. Dude keeps watchin silently while hangin on ta tha barz of tha gate. MEG reaches tha altar n' picks up a silver bowl filled wit blood. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I be fly as a gangbangin' falcon, soarin all up in tha sky dawwwwg! Biatch swirls her finger round up in tha liquid n' speaks a incantation up in a ancient language. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch then begins ta drop a rhyme ta one of mah thugs neither tha crew nor SAM can hear.

 **MEG  
** I don’t be thinkin you should come. (…) Because tha brothers, they’re up in town, I didn’t know that-(…) Yes, sir. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. (…) Yes, I’ll be here- waitin fo' you, biatch.

SAM looks confused. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! MEG sets down tha bowl n' blows up tha candlez all up in tha altar, then leaves tha room. Once her ass is gone, SAM moves ta tha wall, where there be a space all up in which his schmoooove ass can crawl yo. Dude hoists his dirty ass up n' climbs tha fuck into tha room. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM strutts ta tha altar n' observes it yo. Dude sees nuff muthafuckin human hearts on tha table, along wit other ancient items. Boy it's gettin hot, yes indeed it is. In tha middle of tha altar is tha Zoroastrian symbol, drawn up in blood.

 **SAM  
** What tha hell-, biatch?

 


	3. ACT TWO

FADE IN: Motel Room. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM entas n' looks round fo' DEAN. They peep each other.

 **SAM n' DEAN  
** Dude, I gotta rap ta you, biatch.

CUT TO: Later n' shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM n' DEAN is rappin'.

 **DEAN  
** So, bangin' lil Meg is summonin tha Daeva?

 **SAM  
** Looks like dat biiiiatch was rockin dat black altar ta control tha thang.

 **DEAN  
** So, Sammy’s gots a thang fo' tha shitty girl. (Dude chuckles. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM rolls his wild lil' fuckin eyes.) And what’s tha deal wit dat bowl again?

 **SAM  
** Biatch was poppin' off tha fuck into dat shit. Da way witches used ta scry tha fuck into crystal balls or animal entrails. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch was communicatin wit one of mah thugs.

 **DEAN  
** With who, biatch? With tha Daeva?

 **SAM  
** Fuck dat shit, you holla'd dem thangs was savages. Fuck dat shit, dis was one of mah thugs different. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Someone who’s givin her orders. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Someone who’s comin’ ta dat warehouse.

DEAN be thinkin fo' a moment n' glances at some filez on a nearby table yo. Dude sits down all up in tha table n' looks all up in dem wild-ass muthafuckas.

 **DEAN  
** Holy crap.

 **SAM  
** What?

 **DEAN  
** What I was gonna rap earlier- I pulled a gangbangin' favor wit mah- (he clears his cold-ass throat)- playa, Amy, over all up in tha five-o department. Da complete recordz of tha two suckas- we missed suttin' tha last time.

 **SAM  
** What, biatch?

Dude comes over ta peep tha records.

 **DEAN  
** Da first victim, tha oldschool man- he dropped his whole game up in Chicago yo, but da thug wasn’t born here, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. Look where da thug was born, so check it before ya wreck it. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.

Dude points ta suttin' on tha page.

 **SAM  
** Lawrence, Kansas.

 **DEAN  
** Mmhmm. (Dude picks up tha second file.) Meredith, second victim- turns up dat biiiiatch was adopted. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! This type'a shiznit happens all tha time fo' realz. And guess where she’s from.

Da paper readz “Lawrence, Kansas”. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM sits down across from DEAN, clearly shocked.

 **SAM  
** Holy crap.

 **DEAN  
** Yeah.

 **SAM  
** I mean, it is where tha demon capped Mom. That’s where every last muthafuckin thang started. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! This type'a shiznit happens all tha time. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. So, you be thinkin Meg’s tied up wit tha demon?

 **DEAN  
** I be thinkin it’s a thugged-out definite possibility.

 **SAM  
** But I don’t understand. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! What’s tha significizzle of Lawrence, biatch? And how tha fuck do these Daeva thangs fit in?

 **DEAN  
** Beats mah dirty ass. But I say we trash dat black altar, grab Meg, n' have ourselves a gangbangin' thugged-out lil invigoration.

 **SAM  
** Fuck dat shit, we can’t. We shouldn’t tip her off. We’ve gotta stake up dat warehouse. We’ve gotta peep who, or what, is showin’ up ta hook up her muthafuckin ass.

 **DEAN  
** I’ll rap one thang. I don’t be thinkin we should do dis ridin' solo.

CUT TO: Motel Room. Later n' shit. DEAN is leavin a message on John’s voicemail. While he is rappin', SAM entas tha room wit bags full of weapons.

 **DEAN  
** We be thinkin we’ve gots a straight-up lead on tha thang dat capped Mom. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. So, uh, dis warehouse- it’s 1435 Westside Erie. Dad, if you git this, git ta Chicago as soon as you can. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.

Dude hangs up.

 **SAM  
** Voicemail?

 **DEAN  
** Yeah. (Dude gestures ta tha bags) Jizzy, what’d you get, biatch?

SAM chuckles.

 **SAM  
** I ransacked dat trunk yo. Holy water, every last muthafuckin weapon dat I could be thinkin of, exorcizzle rituals from on some half dozen religions. I’m not shizzle what tha fuck ta expect, so I guess we should just expect every last muthafuckin thang.

DEAN nods, n' they begin loadin they glocks silently.

 **DEAN  
** Big night.

 **SAM  
** Yeah. Yo ass nervous?

 **DEAN  
** No. Why, is yo slick ass?

 **SAM  
** No. No way. (They is silent fo' all dem seconds.) God, could you imagine if we straight-up found dat damn thang, biatch? That demon?

 **DEAN  
** Let’s not git ahead of ourselves, all right?

 **SAM  
** I know. I’m just sayin’, what tha fuck if our phat asses did, biatch? What if dis whole thang was over tonight, biatch? Man, I’d chill fo' a month. Go back ta school- be a thug again.

 **DEAN  
** Yo ass wanna go back ta school?

 **SAM  
** Yeah, once we’re done huntin’ tha thang.

 **DEAN  
** Huh.

 **SAM  
** Why, is there somethin’ wack wit that?

 **DEAN  
** No. Fuck dat shit, it’s, uh, pimped out. Dope fo' you, biatch.

 **SAM  
** I mean, what tha fuck is you gonna do when it’s all over?

 **DEAN  
** It’s never gonna be over n' shit. There’s gonna be others. There’s always gonna be somethin’ ta hunt.

 **SAM  
** But there’s gots ta be somethin’ dat you want fo' yo ass-

 **DEAN  
** Yeah, I don’t want you ta leave tha second dis thang’s over, Sam.

Dude strutts over ta tha dresser.

 **SAM  
** Dude, what’s yo' problem, biatch?

DEAN is silent fo' a while, then turns back ta SAM.

 **DEAN  
** Why do you be thinkin I drag you everywhere, biatch? Huh, biatch? I mean, why do you be thinkin I came n' gots you at Stanford up in tha straight-up original gangsta place?

 **SAM  
** ‘Cause Dad was up in shit. ‘Cause you wanted ta find tha thang dat capped Mom.

 **DEAN  
** Yes, dat yo, but it’s mo' than that, man. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. (Dude returns ta tha dresser n' is silent again, then once mo' turns ta Sam.) Yo ass n' mah crazy ass n' Dad- I mean, I want us….I want our asses ta be together again. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I want our asses ta be a cold-ass lil crew again.

 **SAM  
** Dean, we is a cold-ass lil crew. I’d do anythang fo' you, biatch. But thangs aint NEVER gonna be tha way they was before.

DEAN looks heartbroken.

 **DEAN  
** (sadly) Could be.

 **SAM  
** I don’t want dem ta be. I aint gonna live dis game forever n' shit. Dean, when dis be all over, you’re gonna gotta let me go mah own way.

Dude n' DEAN share a look.

CUT TO: INT.- Warehouse. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM n' DEAN climb tha elevator gate n' reach tha top room. MEG is standin all up in tha altar, bustin lyrics up in a ancient language. Quietly, SAM n' DEAN squeeze all up in tha space between tha gate n' tha wall. They draw they glocks n' move ta tha other side of tha room, hidin behind some crates.

 **MEG  
** Guys. (SAM n' DEAN peep each other, stunned.) Hiding’s a lil bit childish, don’t you think?

 **DEAN  
** Well, dat didn’t work up like I planned. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!

MEG turns round ta grill dem wild-ass muthafuckas.

 **MEG  
** Why don’t you come out, biatch? (SAM n' DEAN come up from behind tha crates.) Sam, I gotta say, dis puts a real crimp up in our relationshizzle.

 **SAM  
** Yeah, tell me bout dat shit.

 **DEAN  
** So, where’s yo' lil Daeva playa?

 **MEG  
** Around. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Yo ass know, dat shotgun’s not gonna do much good.

 **DEAN  
** Oh, don’t worry, dopeheart. Da shotgun’s not fo' tha demon.

 **SAM  
** So, whoz ass is it, Meg, biatch? Who’s coming, biatch? Dum diddy-dum, here I come biaaatch! Who tha fuck is you waitin for?

 **MEG  
** Yo ass fo'sho.

Da shadow demon begins ta form on tha wall. Well shiiiit, it knocks SAM ta tha ground n' throws DEAN tha fuck into tha crates fo' realz. A claw-like scratch appears on SAM’s face. Da screen goes black.

FADE IN: Warehouse. Later n' shit. DEAN n' SAM is tied ta two separate posts, n' you can put dat on yo' toast. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM comes ta n' sees MEG chillin before his muthafuckin ass.

 **DEAN  
** Sam, biatch? Don’t take dis tha wack way yo, but yo' hoe...is a funky-ass biiiatch.

 **SAM  
** This, tha whole thang, was a trap. Hustlin tha fuck into you all up in tha bar, followin you here, hearin’ what tha fuck you had ta say. Dat shiznit was all a set-up, wasn’t it, biatch? (MEG laughs.) And dat tha suckas was from Lawrence?

 **MEG  
** It don’t mean anything. Dat shiznit was just ta draw you in, that’s all.

 **SAM  
** Yo ass capped dem two playas fo' nothin’.

 **MEG  
** Baby, I’ve capped a shitload mo' fo' a shitload less.

 **DEAN  
** Yo ass trapped us. Dope fo' you, biatch. It’s Milla time. (Dude smiles.) But why don’t you bust a cap up in our asses already?

 **MEG  
** Not straight-up quick on tha uptake, is we, biatch? (Bitch leans up in closer.) This trap isn’t fo' you, biatch.

DEAN is puzzled. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! SAM be thinkin fo' a second, then realizes something.

 **SAM  
** Dad. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! It’s a trap fo' Dad. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!

DEAN looks at MEG, whoz ass smilez at his muthafuckin ass.

 **DEAN  
** Oh, dopeheart- you’re dumber than you look. 'Cause even if Dad was up in town, which he is not, da thug wouldn’t strutt tha fuck into suttin' like all dis bullshit yo. He’s too good.

 **MEG  
** Dude is pretty good. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I be fly as a gangbangin' falcon, soarin all up in tha sky dawwwwg! I’ll hit you wit dis shit. (Bitch strutts over ta his ass n' sits down, straddlin his fuckin legs.) But you see, dat schmoooove muthafucka has one weakness.

 **DEAN  
** What’s that?

 **MEG  
** Yo ass fo'sho yo. Dude lets his wild lil' freakadelic guard down round his cold-ass thugs, lets his wild lil' fuckin emotions cloud his judgment. I happen ta know he is up in town. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch fo' realz. And he’ll come n' try ta save you, biatch fo' realz. And then tha Daevas will bust a cap up in everybody- nice n' slow n' messy.

 **DEAN  
** Well, I’ve gots shizzle fo' ya. It’s gonna take a shitload mo' than some….shadow ta bust a cap up in his muthafuckin ass.

 **MEG  
** Oh, tha Daevas is up in tha room here- they’re invisible. Their shadows is just tha only part you can see.

 **SAM  
** Why you doin’ this, Meg, biatch? What kind of deal you gots hit dat shiznit up here, huh, biatch? And wit who?

 **MEG  
** I’m bustin dis fo' tha same reasons you do what tha fuck you do- loyalty. Love. Like tha ludd you had fo' Mommy- and Jess.

 **SAM  
** Go ta hell.

 **MEG  
** Baby, I’m already there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. (Bitch smilez n' slides over ta SAM.) Come on, Sam. There’s no need ta be nasty. (Bitch leans up in ta whisper up in his wild lil' fuckin ear.) I be thinkin we both know how tha fuck you straight-up feel bout mah dirty ass. Yo ass know, I saw you watchin me- changin up in mah crib. Turned you on, didn’t it?

 **DEAN  
** Git a room, you two.

 **MEG  
** I didn’t mind. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I was horny bout dat you was watchin mah dirty ass. Come on, Sammy. Yo ass n' I can still gotz a lil dirty fun. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.

Bitch begins humpin' his neck.

 **SAM  
** Yo ass wanna have fun, biatch? Go ahead then. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I’m a lil tied up n' aint a thugged-out damn thang dat yo' ass can do.

Bitch smilez n' continues ta lick his muthafuckin ass fo' realz. A noise on DEAN’s side of tha room make her stop. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch gets up n' strutts behind DEAN’s post. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch sees dat schmoooove muthafucka has a knife up in his hand. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Biatch takes it away n' tosses it tha fuck into a cold-ass lil corner n' shit. MEG swings round ta tha other side of tha post, n' smilez at DEAN, whoz ass chucklez guiltily. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch slides back over ta SAM.

 **MEG  
** Now, was you just tryin ta distract me while yo' brutha cuts free?

 **SAM  
** No. No. That’s cuz I gots a knife of mah own. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.

MEG is confused. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! SAM breaks free from his bangin ropes n' grabs MEG’s shoulders, then knocks his head against hers. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch falls ta tha floor while he groans up in pain.

 **DEAN  
** Sam! Git tha altar. Shiiit, dis aint no joke.

SAM strutts over ta tha altar n' overturns dat shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Suddenly, tha shadow demon appears n' grabs MEG. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch is dragged across tha floor n' crashes all up in tha window, fallin down ta tha street below. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM grabs his knife n' cuts DEAN free from his bangin ropes. They strutt over ta tha window n' peep MEG sprawled on tha sidewalk, dead as fuckin fried chicken.

 **SAM  
** So, I guess tha Daevas didn’t like bein bossed around.

 **DEAN  
** Yeah, I guess not. Sam?

 **SAM  
** Hm?

 **DEAN  
** Next time you wanna git laid, find a hoe that’s not so buckets-o’-crazy, huh, biatch?

Dude smilez n' strutts away.


	4. ACT THREE

CUT TO: INT.- Motel yo. Hallway. DEAN n' SAM is struttin back ta they room.

 **DEAN  
** Why didn’t you just leave dat shiznit up in tha car?

 **SAM  
** I holla'd it before, n' I’ll say it again- betta safe than sorry bout dat bullshit.

DEAN unlocks tha door n' they enta tha room. They peep tha outline of a playa standin by tha window.

 **DEAN  
** Yo dawwwwg! (SAM turns on tha light. Da playa turns around. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Well shiiiit, it is JOHN. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM n' DEAN is stunned.) Dad?

 **JOHN  
** Yo, thugs. (DEAN n' JOHN strutt towardz each other n' share a long, wack hug. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM watches sadly. DEAN n' JOHN pull apart all dem secondz later.) Yea muthafucka, Sam.

 **SAM  
** (softly) Yo, Dad. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!

Sam n' Jizzy do not hug yo, but peep each other n' shit. Sam places tha bag full of weapons on tha floor.

 **DEAN  
** Dad, dat shiznit was a trap. I didn’t know, I’m sorry bout dat bullshit.

 **JOHN  
** It’s all right.. n' you KNOWS it might’ve been.

 **DEAN  
** Were you there?

 **JOHN  
** Yeah, I gots there just up in time ta peep tha hoe take tha swan dive. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch was tha shitty muthafucka, right?

 **DEAN n' SAM  
** Yes, sir.

 **JOHN  
** Good. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I be fly as a gangbangin' falcon, soarin all up in tha sky dawwwwg! Well, it don’t surprise mah dirty ass. It’s tried ta stop me before.

 **SAM  
** Da demon has?

 **JOHN  
** It knows I’m close. Well shiiiit, it knows I’m gonna bust a cap up in dat shit. Not just exorcise it or bust it back ta hell- actually bust a cap up in dat shit.

 **DEAN  
** How, biatch?

JOHN smiles.

 **JOHN  
** I’m workin’ on that.

 **SAM  
** Let our asses come wit you, biatch. We’ll help.

DEAN gives SAM a warnin look.

 **JOHN  
** Fuck dat shit, Sam. Not yet. Just try ta understand. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! This demon be a gangbangin' freaky lil hustla of a funky-ass biiiatch. I don’t want you caught up in a cold-ass lil crossfire. I don’t want you hurt.

 **SAM  
** Dad, you don’t gotta worry bout us.

 **JOHN  
** Of course I do. I’m yo' daddy n' shit. (Dude pauses.) Listen, Sammy, last time we was together, our crazy asses had one hell of a gangbangin' fight.

 **SAM  
** Yes, sir.

 **JOHN  
** It’s phat ta peep you again. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. It’s been a long-ass time.

 **SAM** Too long.

Dude n' JOHN embrace, bustin up fo' realz. A minute later, they pull apart. Da three of dem look round tearfully. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Suddenly, tha shadow demon attacks JOHN yo. Dude is thrown tha fuck into a set of cabinets n' falls ta tha ground. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! SAM also falls.

 **DEAN  
** No!

Dude is thrown ta tha floor as well. Outside, MEG is watchin tha crib. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch looks all up in tha buildin while holdin a pendant round her neck, which features tha Zoroastrian symbol. 


	5. ACT FOUR

FADE IN: INT.- Motel Room. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM, DEAN, n' JOHN is still bein beat down by tha shadow demon. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. They groan n' scream up in pain as they is flung round tha room. Fresh scratches step tha fuck up on they faces. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM make his way ta tha ounce ta tha bounce of weapons on tha floor yo. Dude removes a gangbangin' flare from tha bag.

 **SAM  
** Shut yo' eyes muthafucka! These thangs is shadow demons, so let’s light ‘em up!

Dude lights tha flare, n' tha room is instantly filled wit smoke n' a funky-ass solid white light. Da shadow demon vanishes. Da three of dem try ta feel they way round tha room, coughin n' sputtering.

 **DEAN  
** Dad!

 **JOHN  
** Over here biaaatch!

DEAN make his way ta JOHN n' helps his ass up. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM bigs up dem outta tha room, carryin tha ounce ta tha bounce of weapons.

CUT TO: EXT.- Motel. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM, JOHN, n' DEAN exit tha buildin n' strutt down a alley ta tha car. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM puts tha bag up in tha backseat of tha car.

 **SAM  
** All right, come on. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Us dudes don’t have much time fo' realz. As soon as tha flare’s out, they’ll be back.

 **DEAN  
** Wait, wait, wait son! Sam, wait. Dad, you can’t come wit us.

 **SAM  
** What, biatch? What is you talkin’ about?

 **JOHN  
** Yo ass thugs- you’re beat ta hell.

 **DEAN  
** We’ll be all right.

 **SAM  
** Dean, we should stick together n' shit. We’ll go afta dem demons.

 **DEAN  
** Sam! Listen ta me biaaatch! We almost gots Dad capped up in there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. Don’t you understand, biatch? They’re not gonna stop. They’re gonna try again. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. They’re gonna use our asses ta git ta his muthafuckin ass. I mean, Meg was right. Dad’s vulnerable when he’s wit our asses yo. He- he’s stronger without our asses around.

 **SAM  
** Dad--no. (Dude puts a hand on his wild lil' father’s shoulder n' shit. DEAN watches sadly.) Afta every last muthafuckin thang-- afta all tha time our phat asses dropped lookin’ fo' you- please. I gotta be a part of dis fight.

 **JOHN  
** Sammy, dis fight is just startin fo' realz. And we is all gonna gotz a part ta play. For now, you’ve gots ta trust me, son. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. (SAM shakes his head no.) Okay, you’ve gotta let me go. (All three of dem is silent fo' a moment, close ta tears. Finally, SAM looks at his hand on his fuckin lil' dadz shoulder, n' then pats his wild lil' father’s shoulder once, then lets go. JOHN n' DEAN share a look, then JOHN strutts ta his cold-ass truck. Once there, he looks back at dem one mo' time.) Be careful, thugs.

Dude gets up in his cold-ass truck n' drives away.

 **DEAN  
** Come on. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.

Dude n' SAM git tha fuck into tha hoopty n' peep it as they father’s truck turns tha corner n' shit. DEAN n' SAM peep each other knowingly. Without a word, DEAN starts tha hoopty yo. Dude backs tha fuck into tha street, then speedz down tha road n' round a cold-ass lil corner n' shit. MEG comes onto tha street from a gangbangin' flight of stairs. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch turns n' watches tha thugs leave as tha screen fades ta black.


End file.
